Is It Really “No Big Deal”?
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Tip
When someone bothers or offends you, it’s natural to give them the benefit of the doubt and say, "It’s no big deal.” But not so fast. Next time stop and ask yourself: Am I really unbothered, or am I just trying to avoid conflict? If your honest answer is the latter, it’s a sign that you should take action.
Though speaking up for yourself can be hard, it’s the only way to really resolve the core issue. Schedule a time to talk to the offending party or pull them aside for a private conversation. It may be better to let some time pass before you chat, so that you’re less emotionally charged. And seek a conversation, not a confrontation.
Treat the whole thing as an opportunity for both of you to learn and grow. Not everything that triggers an emotional response requires action. But if something really is “no big deal,” chances are you’d say something without hesitation.
So, next time you’re inclined to say “It’s no big deal,” stop and consider whether that’s actually true, so you can address things before they really become a big deal.
Translations
🇨🇳 这真的是“没什么大不了的”吗？
当有人打扰或冒犯你的时候，很自然的就会对他们说：“没什么大不了的。” 但别那么快。 下一次，停下来问问自己：我真的没有被打扰，还是我只是在试图避免冲突?如果你诚实的回答是后者，这是一个信号，你应该采取行动。
尽管为自己说话可能很难，但这是真正解决核心问题的唯一方法。安排一个时间和冒犯的一方谈话，或者把他们拉到一边进行私人谈话。在你们聊天之前，最好等一段时间，这样你就不会那么情绪化了。寻求对话，而不是对抗。
把这整件事当作你们两个学习和成长的机会。 并非触发情绪反应的所有事情都需要行动。 但是如果某事真的“没什么大不了的”，你可能会毫不犹豫地说出某事。
所以，下一次当你想说“没什么大不了的”时，停下来想一想这是否是真的，这样你就可以在事情变成大事之前解决它们。
