Set Boundaries with Your Chatty Coworker
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Tip
It can be a nice break to chat with colleagues. But what should you do if you have a coworker who goes on endlessly, monopolizing your time and wearing down your patience? You don’t have to just sit through their monologues. Set clear and respectful boundaries so you can focus on what matters, while maintaining your relationship.
Start by preempting their request when the conversation begins. You might say, “I only have 10 minutes to chat right now” or “I have a hard stop at the top of the hour.” Don’t feel like you have to provide an explanation, but if you do, use “I” language to show ownership over the reason (and prevent any potential pushback). For example, you might say, “I’m on a deadline,” or “I feel overstretched at the moment.”
And, of course, you may have to interrupt if they get on a tear. Do so politely: “Can I jump in to share my thoughts here?” And if that doesn’t work, interject more forcefully.
Try an assertiveness technique called “the broken record,” where you state one phrase repeatedly in an even-handed tone. For example, you can say the person’s name: “John, John, John — excuse me, but I have to get back to work.”
This isn’t easy but the more you set those boundaries, the more you’ll prove to yourself — and others — that your time and energy are as valuable as anyone else’s.
Translations
🇨🇳 与健谈的同事设置底线
和同事聊天是一个很好的休息。但是，如果你的同事无休止地工作，独占你的时间，消磨你的耐心，你该怎么办?你不需要坐着看完他们的独白。设定清晰和尊重的界限，这样你就可以在保持关系的同时专注于重要的事情。
在对话开始时先抢占他们的请求。你可能会说，我现在只有 10 分钟的聊天时间，或者我在这一小时的开头要停下来。不要觉得你必须提供一个解释，但如果你这样做，使用我的语言来表明对原因的所有权(并防止任何潜在的阻力)
当然，如果他们滔滔不绝，你可能不得不打断他们。礼貌地说：“我能在这里分享我的想法吗？”如果这不起作用，就更有力地插话。
试着用一种叫做“反复重复”的自信技巧，你用公平的语气重复说出一个短语。 例如，你可以说出这个人的名字：“John, John, John——对不起，我得回去工作
这并不容易，但是你越是设定这些界限，你就越能向自己和他人证明你的时间和精力和其他人一样有价值。
